Spiders!

I know, I’ve been busy. But I took the time from my really really important stuff to fire up a quick post and warning to my oblivious ilk here in town.

We all know about spider season here in Montesano. Sure, the C of C and touristy places don’t talk about it….for a reason, but we all sort of live with it. It’s part of the unique mosaic and irony that is Montesano.

About a week ago started getting bites. Typical little itchy small spider bites. A lot like mosquito bites but we all know the difference. Lots of them. Now they are evolving into giant flesh eating craters that itch like crazy. Constantly.

Main grouping is standard pattern of a wandering particularly nasty one that bites in a line. I’ve seen it before. Not content to just bite you, but really leave its mark traveling down your arm. Oh bother. Hey, it’s spider season in Montesano. Been there done that.

Then a few days later bites here and there showing up so it wasn’t just a wandering spider that got trapped in a shirt or something. And now the initial grouping has turned into giant craters of festering flesh eating itchy open wounds. These are not normal spiders!

I know what you are thinking……something got out up at the Montesano Bio and Infectious Disease Laboratory up near the lake. Nobody is buying that “road closure” that has been down for months now while they “clear a tree from the road”. Cars are going down that road all the time. Government cars. Um hum.

Or ole Tom stuck his arm in someplace he shouldn’t have. Nothing to worry about. Hey……this is how it starts people. The townsfolk always ignore the harbinger….then there is running and screaming. You’ve seen the movie.

I’m known around here for my superhero like will power ability. I am using all of it to keep from scratching. Every cream, compress, and pill in my cupboard has been used and ingested. Remember a few weeks ago when I wrote about my saving old medications and you were all laughing at me? I knew I was right…..I knew it.

All to no avail though, nothing is working. I will either get through this or be eaten away from this flesh dissolving venom these spiders are trying to preserve me with to feed their ever hungry and growing children.

I have taken my bedroom apart. Sprayed, cleaned …..you name it. I blasted it so well even the cat turns up her nose and won’t come in there. Frankly, the lingering fumes comfort me somehow as I drift blissfully into slumber surrounded by my faint toxic cloud of protection. I’m even destroying the old couch Rocky the Wonder dog likes to sleep on tomorrow.

I’ve taken to sleeping in pajamas. I don’t wear pajamas. The only ones I have are pattered withy these little spaceships on them that Linda made for me years ago. Kinda cool though. Ive asked her for another pair. Something with dinosaurs on them. I’m doing the work here.

Sleep…ya right, there is no sleeping. More bolting up after a few hours and running to the medicine cabinet like a crazed junkie, sitting up dazed on Benadryl (which I’m told can help with the antihistamine effect). until I get tired and this repeats. Screaming at Linda ” it’s been four hours can I take another pill? No, she always curtly shoots back and then sticks an iPad in my face telling me about you took this or that and it reacts with this or that ….you have to wait. And I wait. Sitting there. Listening for the pitter patter of spiders on my wood floor. I know they are watching me.

You think we were paranoid washing our mail during the dark days of Covid. Hell, I’m afraid to stick my arm in the mailbox! I’m about ready to keep people on my porch and talk through the door. Can’t be too careful with what they might have on their shoulder you know. Until I come up with a sanitation arch system that is.

Linda isn’t getting bit. Just me. Now both arms, torso and on the hands. Even paying a visit to the crazy witch lady up off of McBride avenue for a poultice is sounding reasonable at the moment. I know I know…..those things she sells stink to all heaven…..

I don’t think these are our normal spiders. I’m going into the drug store in the morning and see if there isn’t something out there……before madness engulfs me.

EDIT: I had a stock photo posted but took it down as I don’t want to put the wrong picture up.